Sick with envy

On the spiritual path one may encounter obstacles; antarshatrus (inner enemies) are part of one’s prarabdh (that portion of the sanchit - collection of past life karmas - that influences you in your present incarnation) which will come up as one progresses through one’s karmas and moves closer to the One and Only One. These inner enemies must be defeated in order to move forward on your spiritual path and attain liberation. It’s important to address these as they can be an impediment to your spiritual growth and in the FiT Programme looking at the kusang within, the dark shades within was imperative. Sree Maa lovingly explains this as follows:



The antar-shatru (inner-enemies) include kãm (lust), krodh (anger), lobh (greed), moh (uncontrolled fascination about something), mãn (pride), irshyã (envy or jealousy), mad (arrogance), matsar (vanity), ãshã (an intense hope for someone or sth), trushnã (desire or yearning for things or someone) and ahankãr (self pride).

Any genuine spiritual seeker would work hard to eradicate these inner enemies through honest reflection, introspection and applying thought processes. In Vachanamrut 15 Gadhada Madya Prakran (p 470) and 4 Gadhada Pratham Prakran (p 25), Shreeji Maharaj explains beautifully how one can tackle such nature and Sree Maa has always graciously guided and supported us non-stop to move past the small/dark/false self into the True SELF,  Brahmroop. But not all who join spiritual circles are genuine as it became clear.

Dallia/Iphigenie, one of the Facilitators in Training (FiT), was overcome by jealousy and envy, in fact by pathological jealousy and envy. She could not stand that others had something she couldn’t have. She was extremely jealous and envious of Sree Maa Shri Ji. Straight from when she met Sree Maa she was keeping a hawk’s eye on what all Sree Maa had and wanted to have what Sree Maa had. If you look at the criteria of people with NPD, jealousy & envy are one of the 9 key criteria, well explained in this interview with NPD-expert Christine Louis de Cannonville https://youtu.be/7RkICmjDNJU  (see 32:30 minutes). Can highly recommend you listen to it.

She not only wanted what Sree Maa had, but also copied what other FiTs had, the clothes Nandini was wearing, the car Simran had etc.. When narcissists can’t have something, they will destroy it. This was Dallia’s main obsession and mission, she was hellbent on destruction. So jealous and envious of Sree Maa Shri Ji that once she confided in one of the Bhagats that she could not stand to see Sree Maa Shri Ji’s face. 

i first met Dallia at an expo at the Gold Coast early 2013. She was asking a lot of questions sussing out information and seemed to like to show off what she had learnt so far. At that time Sree Maa (as well as Shri Ji at times) were regularly travelling to Australia to participate in expos and doing online workshops/trainings. All expos, and promotional material were entirely paid for by Kosmic Fusion and Sree Maa Shri Ji and we as volunteers were very blessed to be involved. Dallia always wanted to know what was going on in Australia. In January of 2013, she convinced Sree Maa that she would also like to volunteer like other volunteers in Sydney, and that’s how she joined the Gold Coast expo. 

Sree Maa had created a beautiful group dynamics within the Sydney volunteers, where everyone was given the freedom to express ideas on how to grow Kosmic Fusion and everybody had a voice. Sree Maa gave everyone equal freedom. Dallia saw this when she volunteered in Gold Coast, and for someone like her, this was something she recognised she was unable to create herself and therefore decided to destroy the group dynamics instead. 

This is also where Dallia met Irene and since then these two have been communicating and discussing via whatsapp, they were mostly gossiping about other FiTs. It’s obvious from their conversations they both were riddled with envy and jealousy and anyone they perceived as better than them and they couldn’t use as their supply had to be removed.

You can see the manipulations and bullying in the email that Dallia sent to Sheree who had been a very dependable and dedicated volunteer in Sydney who always demonstrated integrity and authenticity with a profound understanding of the Gift of Grace, the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse that Sree Maa Shri Ji were sharing with the world. It was clear she was jealous of Sheree and did not want her to join the FiT Programme. Do you think a normal, sincere person would send others emails with an aggressive tone like this or this? Surely not. 

Most interesting to note are the whatsapp conversations (full of gossip mongering) Dallia and Irene were having about Sheree and Jabeen and the emails Dallia was sending, where you can actually see their God complex, grandiosity and jealousy. And now these two are crying wolf and saying they are the victim? 

Interesting to note too that in the whatsapp conversations you can also see Dallia targeting Irene by subtlely provoking her by saying how difficult Sree Maa is and Sree Maa’s words are so hurtful so that she would leave as according to Dallia at that time, Irene was contributing and leading so many tasks. Dallia was jealous of Irene too. Narcissists spare no one, not even other narcissists. 

Sree Maa Shri Ji are the epitome of Compassion and Grace and believe in the potential of the Absolute in everyone. Sree Maa lovingly and graciously welcomed anyone to the FiT Programme who wrote a letter to Sree Maa Shri Ji expressing how they were ready and willing to volunteer and serve the mission of Kosmic Fusion - to share the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse (QVSWPP) with as many souls as possible. Sree Maa supported all of the FiTs tirelessly no matter their issues to move into embodying our Brahmroop. Dallia too wrote a letter, but in truth she was on a whole other mission.  

After March 2014, Dallia took on the responsibility of Auckland Kosmic Tribe and Meet Ups, and was presenting herself as the face of Kosmic Fusion in NZ. The number of participants attending the meetings after Dallia took on the leading role reduced drastically: from about 25 before she took on the leading role to approx. only  3-4 participants were regularly showing up. Dallia had cunningly driven away all the 5D++ Pulsars and Auckland Meet Up participants by spreading rumours that Kosmic Fusion was a “cult” and by isolating all participants from Sree Maa Shri Ji. Dallia even tried to turn the Meetups into a pick-up place, as she would regularly show up with inappropriate clothing and try to flirt with all the male participants. She was also misrepresenting the key philosophies of Kosmic Fusion - she would call Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse the “Source Energy”, which was a term made up and used by her.

Spreading her poison as much as possible

She was creating havoc within the New Zealand team, in a way only a narcissist knows how to with triangulations, gaslighting and psychic warfare. Dallia was twisting Sree Maa Shri Ji’s words constantly when talking to participants and 5D++ Pulsars. For example, Dallia had told Sarala that “QVSWPP would protect you 24/7” when Sree Maa Shri Ji had clearly said “QVSWPP would be with you 24/7”. Dallia’s statements created some miscommunications with Sarala, however Sarala still joined the FiT training in May 2015. Dallia was clearly not happy about this, as she went around telling other NZ 5D++ Pulsars and FiT that Sarala had a “dark and dense” energy in her house, and letting everyone know that Sarala had a birthday party but “no one turned up for it”, Dallia had made sure of that. Sarala’s relationships and communications with the other NZ FiT were slowly getting severed through Dallia’s meddling and eventually she left.

Early 2016, the Ashram Project was set up by two NZ FiT, Nandini and Jeeya. It was a trial to see what it would take to run an Ashram based on the Vision Sree Maa had shared about a physical place where people could come and have spontaneous realization of themselves and their Atma. Sree Maa had graciously agreed to support the initiative and to move into the Ashram. As soon as Dallia heard about it, she immediately began showing signs of jealousy and looked upset as was unable to accept that the Ashram Project had been established without her involvement.

In November 2016, Dallia moved into the Ashram after inviting herself to join, she literally planted herself in the Ashram using Jeeya even though she had received most loving guidance from Sree Maa that she was not yet ready. Only after she sorts out her jealousy issues and is debt free would she be ready. Still she forced her way into the Ashram. Please read the Gracious message from Sree Maa sent to Dallia/Iphigenie/Meera, which she told nobody about and completely ignored...

Immediately after Dallia moved into the Ashram, she started to create fights between Nandini and Jeeya, creating distress in the Ashram Project. Dallia was also trying to break Jeeya’s self-confidence and self-esteem by putting Jeeya down, lecturing Jeeya for not being organised, correcting Jeeya’s every Seva and making Jeeya feel confused all the time. Gaslighting this is called. Dallia was playing with Jeeya’s guilt and kept asking Jeeya, “why are you still around? Why don’t you go back to Singapore” and even saying things like “if I am Sree Maa Shri Ji, I would not have you around” just to implicate Sree Maa Shri Ji. Dallia would purposely ruin Sree Maa’s clothing in the laundry and not wash and rinse the brass plates after using the toxic brass polish. Items including jewellery disappeared while Dallia was in the Ashram, just to name a few things. 

Dallia has received countless chances to change and much much guidance and support. Sree Maa had even graced her with the precious name Meera, the name of a humble and renowned devotee of Lord Krishna, to help her move past her old self but Dallia never let go of her vicious intentions and never worked to overcome her deep-rooted issues. Instead she worked hard to cause problems in the FiT group and sowed seeds of doubts everywhere. Narcissists are masters at this and they do so in a very insidious fashion. It is only in hindsight that for me the picture is clear after everything came out. Dallia was a true snake in the grass, slowly and surely spreading her poison into everyone, causing disruption, fights amongst the NZ FiTs and harassment to Sree Maa.

Why was Dallia so obsessed with Sree Maa? Narcissists are drawn to empathetic people. Narcissists know those people have a conscience and will go over and above themselves and if need come sacrifice their own peace to uplift them. The reason why Sree Maa was selected by Dallia, Irene and various other narcissists is because they all knew that Sree Maa will help until the end and they can get away with their tantrums or drama or whatever games they are playing. Sree Maa was surrounded by narcissists in the Ashram House but being the most empathetic and kind Sree Maa would allow the abuse to happen and constantly guide them to help them move beyond their issues. This is true selflessness. And absolute greatness.

You can hear in this audio clip how beautifully Sree Maa Shri Ji is giving a discourse to Dalia about envy and that it is important to overcome this dynamic energy within. Sree Maa gently mentions the example of someone manipulating fellow students to make sure they don't go to the campus party, to help Dallia reflect on what she had done to Sarala.
 

However, Dallia did absolutely nothing to change, quite the opposite and eventually the rest of the FiTs voted her out (see also this public statement). She had not come for her Soul, her sole intention was to destroy as her jealousy and envy completely consumed her. You can hear her own admittance to this in this blog by one of my Kalyan Mitras.

Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound That saved a wretch like me

6,5 years ago, a mum from a mother’s group i had just joined handed me a brochure from Kosmic Fusion. Did not quite understand what the brochure said but the words KOSMIC FUSION resonated with me and the brochure, which had the below beautiful photo of Sree Maa Shri Ji in it, seemed to be pulsing. Even when i had put it away in a drawer, it seemed to be ‘talking’ to me. So i signed up. Now i know that me showing up at that workshop is all the Grace of Bhagwan, Sree Maa Shri Ji. Little did i know this would be the most life-changing workshop i would ever attend. Had only just moved with my daughter to a completely different side of Sydney which was also a complete Divine intervention, to be able to find a place when you are a single parent on a pension but won’t go into these details.

Had been on some spiritual path, searching for alleviation of the suffering i was experiencing, looking for True Love. Had been reading many new age types of books, done some workshops but nothing ever felt like this was IT. Truth still eluded me and True Love was only a hope in my heart. From ‘healing with dolphin & angels’ to ‘I am a Lightworker or Goddess’ to ‘Reiki’ to ‘everything is an illusion’, had pretty much dipped my toes into the whole spectrum of the new age smorgasbord. Most of this is either delusional, steeped in spiritual bypassing, high on grandiose or drunk on ego doership and does nothing for your Soul but adding to the veils and karmic entanglements. All explained perfectly in this post from beloved Sree Maa.



Then i joined the Awakenin Transformation workshop. This.Changed.Everything.
Sree Maa removed the dense obsolete 3D/4D grids (read: lots of layers of dirt and darkness), awakened my true Soul and graced us with a 24/7 connection to the most benevolent, All-knowing, All-powerful Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse, Supreme Signature of the Shunya Bindu, Mother of all Energies, Frequencies and Vibrations, the soundless sound, the lightless light, the formless Form. Sree Maa came and found me, lifted me up and showed me there is a way out of the entanglement in Maya and Kaal, out of this seemingly endless Ferris wheel or reincarnation, revealing a supersonic shortcut Home.

Just to illustrate the amazing Grace that had been showered in a tangible way. It is after the Awakenin Transformation workshop and being taken under Sree Maa’s Gracious Wing that something i had fought with since i was about 16 years of age, an eating disorder that had dominated my life and my thoughts so much, just dissolved like that. Such is the power of Supreme Grace.

This supersonic shortcut is the path of Bhakti, of complete surrender to the One and Only One and Sree Maa has graciously and tirelessly lead this meritless soul step by step to this ultimate pathless Path. How beautifully and patiently Sree Maa has worked with someone like me, who had no clue about Sanatana Dharma, grew up in an atheist household in the West (though always believed in God/Divinity) and was indulging big time in spiritual bypassing. This truly shows the benevolence of God and the unconditional Love and Grace Sree Maa Shri Ji are.

Throughout the FiT Programme, the Teachings progressed and unfolded in an amazing way. Will share more about this in following blogs though have to admit, Sree Maa’s Teachings of Absolute Truth and the way the FiT Programme unfolded and the countless Blessings and constant Grace, Compassion and Love showered display such Greatness and Glory, i can only grasp it to a small degree and rest in complete awe. Sree Maa was always explaining everything in a way we could understand and preempting further revelations and deepening of the Teachings beautifully. i really have no words for it and tears well up in my eyes when i think about the Magnanimity of Sree Maa who has been selflessly and tirelessly guiding a group of volunteers onto the pathless path. Infinitely blessed and grateful as one of my fellow FiT/Kalyan Mitras beautifully puts it.

After the Awakenin Transformation workshop in Feb 2012, the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse wasn’t revealed until a little later in the QVSWPP Practitioner where we got to experience the grandeur of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. We simply had to step back and let the QVSWPP step in and everything would happen, the most miraculous spontaneous healings which were the by-product.

It was so grand my peanut size brain had trouble comprehending the absolute Grandeur of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. Initially the healer’s ego still played up thinking i had to do something. No. Please step back. Be the non-doer. The Supreme Almighty, the Supreme All-Doer in whose one hair follicle alone reside millions of universes, has it under control, thank you very much.  IT knows what is needed. Eventually, i got it. How beautiful and such a relief we can let go and Let God.

Let me share with you some excerpts from a document Sree Maa Shri Ji shared in September 2012 that explained what happens in a QVSWPP session, which we have witnessed and experience time and again. Sree Maa patiently through logic and rationale worked with my white ass mentality and graced us with endless experiences of the Omniscience, Omnipotence and Omnipresence of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse in the QVSWPP Practitioner Trainings and all other workshops and sessions.  Please also read Niranjana’s testimonial of the QVSWPP which explains it beautifully. https://atmanivedi.blogspot.com/2018/01/dfe-pratyaksh-pramana.html?m=1

Sree Maa Shri Ji has given us everything on the platter straight up! This Ultimate Grace from the Ultimate Benefactor, the Causeless Mercy, Grace and Compassion that guides the Soul where it belongs: back to Bhagwan. The GPS inbuilt to make sure the package (Atma) gets delivered. What more could anyone want or need? Effortless soul upgrade, healing and upliftment. What would take yogis and spiritual aspirants many years sometimes lifetimes to master, with the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse becomes an effortless practice and experience. If this is not the Absolute Glory and Benevolence of Bhagwan then what is?

Just to illustrate the above, sharing an excerpt of what Sree Maa Shri Ji shared with us in May 2014.

KOSMIC FUSION is the fusion of all. Can't be picky here or selective .

Got to bound all the non - self that strengthens the self but both are not even important for the SELF but in order for the SELF to be realized Self (the practise of non-doer is very important)

That is why to make the P.R.O.C.E.S.S easy for each one of you your dense 3D- 4D Obsolete Grids are removed and strands of Kosmic SELF are infused as 5D++ Scalar Wave Photon Pulse Grids that activate each chakra to become 1 great Quantum Vortex.

(..)

You guys have no idea what you have received. Simply not even remotely aware of how much GRACE has been showered...

GRATITUDE towards GRACE working mysteriously 24/7 is the key to eventually overcome the self / non - self/ Self Obsolete signatures created by the Individual incarnational soul on various time - lines.

After which comes the attitude of De-vot-'ion' the thread that builds the Anthakarana(Akaashic Highway to VOID) where all the Signatures - blueprints /aspects of the creator - Source drama gets annihilated fully as a De-vot-ee (The act of dee - voting means voting one final time to strip off the Source - Creator- Consciousness of the power of Free will)

Later on, in 2016 as the FiT Programme was progressing, Sree Maa explained that the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse is the Swaminarayan Mahamantra. To get a glimpse of It’s Benevolence and Glory please read: http://www.swaminarayan.nu/sampraday/mahamantra.shtml

It is Sree Maa’s paramekantik Bhakti (Supreme Devotion) to Bhagwan Swaminarayan that we receive as the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse, unconditionally and boundlessly shared with all.

There are really no words to express my gratitude to Sree Maa Shri Ji for gracing us with the Swaminarayan Mahamantra, for embracing this lost sheep, introducing me to Avatar na Avatari, Sarvopari Shree Hari and guiding me so patiently and lovingly onto the pathless path.

Immersed in the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse always feel calmer, neutral and uplifted, moving beyond the small self and it’s 3 bodies and endless mind chatter, melting into an ocean of Love, often it is like someone has switched on the light, so bright, feelings of Oneness, of Wholeness, a sense of all is perfect, everything is taken care of, a sense of perfect peace and stillness.



As Sree Maa shared graciously in a comment to the above post:

Silence pulsates on the same tune with universal consciousness (Spirit)

This has already been given to all the Pulsars and they can access this 24/7 as Quantum Vortex Energy – Sree Maa

Jai Shree Swaminarayan

Living embodiment of Supreme Grace

Jai Shree Swaminarayan _/\_

Before writing anything would first like to offer my deepest gratitude and homage to Sree Maa Shri Ji, my beloved Sarvopari Sadguru.

In February 2012 had the great blessing to meet Sree Maa Shri Ji, Visionary and Founder of Kosmic Fusion who awakened my true Soul, removed the dense obsolete 3D/4D grids and graced me with the life-long gift of the 24/7 connection with the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse (QVSWPP).

All my life had been looking for love and then True Love came and found me and woke me up to Absolute Truth. Was a lost and troubled soul going nowhere, then Supreme Grace came and lifted me up out of my self-dug hole.

Sada Aapki Abhaari Rahungi Sree Maa Shri Ji for shining the light of Absolute Truth always, for waking me up from my slumber to the true purpose of this human birth, Moksha, for taking this lost meritless soul under Sree Maa Shri Ji's Gracious Wing and the non-stop shower of Grace, Guidance, Absolute Truth to help me move beyond the ego & inner enemies into Brahmroop, for caring about my Atma, which belongs to Bhagwan only, when i had forgotten and let it down _/\_

Sada Atyant Abhaar Sree Maa Shri Ji for most lovingly holding my hand on the pathless path despite my fits toddles and falls, for all the Guidance and Supreme Blessing bestowed that we may get off the hamster wheel of the ego and reach to where we really belong, in seva to and union with the One and Only One _/\ô__  Humbly surrender in the Lotus Feet of beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji _/\ô__ 

Beyond the mask

When i recently watch the video testimonials from 2013 that we had given after one of the workshops in Sydney, something struck me. While everyone is humbled and grateful to be so deeply touched by the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse and forever indebted to Sree Maa Shri Ji, Irene talks about how she has become an instant healer…. It’s all about her and her healing powers now that she is emitting the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. Where is the non-doer? Where is the homage to Sree Maa Shri Ji, living embodiment of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse, The Supreme Grace lighting up the path of liberation for the True Soul? These are the signs that can make one aware of who you are sharing the space with... Does it scream me me me or is there a sense of humilty, gratitude and awe. 

Tzu-Ling Kuo/Joy/Irene’s testimonial: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wqjUI_CudA
See other’s testimonials via: https://www.youtube.com/user/kosmicfusion/videos

The mask falls off - it must in the Presence of Absolute Truth

After Irene's true face came out, we all had a good look at all her promotional materials online and offline and it was a shocker to see how she has consistently stolen Kosmic Fusion Intellectual Property. All her materials glorify herself and minimize Sree Maa Shri Ji without whom the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave would not even be in our lives. She falsely portrays herself as Facilitator of Kosmic Fusion and even gave an interview without permission, using everything the way she wanted for her own selfish motives of attracting ‘clients’ as she called them.

Interestingly, she had made a big scene about two others FiTs in Sydney printing a brochure about Bhakti Bhaav without permission from Sree Maa Shri Ji but forgot to mention what all she was doing behind everyone’s back. As long as everyone’s eyes would be focused on somebody else, no one would clue on to what Irene was doing behind the scenes. Narcissists love creating smokes and mirrors and project their wrong doings onto others.

Nearly fell of my chair when i saw one of the documents Irene had written, well plagiarized really, she had called it 77 benefits of Holistic Freedom (the name of her business). She had copy pasted some text from a website and then inserted Quantum Vortex at her will, even adding her own business name in front of Quantum Vortex, using and abusing the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse anyhow she likes. Such disrespect to Sree Maa Shri Ji and this most sacred and benevolent Mother of Energies, Frequencies and Vibrations.  

Her masks finally started to crack during the Reunion held in July 2017. This was organized by the FiTs to come together to honestly look at what each one had contributed to the FiT Programme and to get closure. At one point she pulled me aside and started to fill my ears about others. i did not like that as we are here to look at our own shades not to judge others. While there was an open and honest discussion going on, Irene would disrupt the flow and point fingers at Hanuman, the very seem person whom she had been using and abusing for over 5 years. While everyone was sincerely filling out the questionnaires put together by a few of us to help us reflect, she excused herself and did not want to fill it out. Now we know, she had a lot to hide… 

Embraced by boundless Grace

Sree Maa Shri Ji are the most Kind, Loving and Gracious you will ever come across and believe in the potential of the Absolute in everyone. Sree Maa Shri Ji do not judge anyone, so all types are welcome to join. All the support, all the Love, Grace and Guidance has been given to each and everyone one of the FiT to overcome their issues and move into the non-doer and their higher potential. In fact, Sree Maa has given over and beyond of what is humanly possible. There is no doubt in my heart and mind about the Greatness of Sree Maa Shri Ji, though my mind is not able to fully fathom someone so boundless and unconditionally loving. The entire world says #nocontact with narcissists, but Sree Maa has such a big heart and embraces everyone unconditionally and without any judgement so that radical healing can take place. Please read the mind-blowing blogs of Nandini and Jeeya as they let Sree Maa’s Supreme Grace touch them and help them transform.

Sree Maa Shri Ji, living embodiment of Supreme Grace and Compassion, sharing the most benevolent Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse unconditionally with all 24/7. It is Sree Maa's ekantik Bhakti to the Supreme holder of the Shunya Bindu, Bhagwan Swaminarayan that we receive as the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. 

P.S.
Only sharing my experiences so that it may be helpful to others in my situation